Every summer, I go on vacation to Florida to visit my cousin, Ashley and her family. I like it—don’t get me wrong—it’s fun for about a week at least. I miss my home in Illinois and the simplicity of it. You’re probably asking what I mean by simplicity and if you give me a minute I’ll tell you.
I’m 22 and I have problems like everyone else, but sometimes I feel like my problems are worse. I live at home with my non-functioning alcoholic mother and my Catholic step-father. The reason it’s simple there is because I have no distractions besides my mother. I didn’t grow up with cable and internet like most kids my age, which I am grateful for because I wouldn’t be who I am today if I grew up surrounded by technology. (No, I am not Amish). Now, I decided to start this journal because I need someone to listen (or read, for you smartasses that are bound to correct me) to what I have to say (or type) because I feel like no one cares anymore. It's like I’m alone. I’m getting off topic.
Vacation…if that’s what you want to call it. I sleep until noon, I get up and do laundry for my Aunt’s when they ask, I sweep the house when I’m asked, and do other things like the dishes. (I do fun things like go to the bar on the weekend, but I’m not a big drinker. I also go to the beach on the weekends, which I don’t mind at all besides the annoying ass sand). The problem is, I can do that shit at home (well not the beach part), why am I doing that here. I should be home helping my step-father not here doing other people’s chores. Now, I think it’s time to tell you about my step-father.
My step-father, Tim, is a pretty good guy. He’s taken care of me since I was three and I owe him a lot for it, especially since my mom’s drinking has gotten worse in the last six years. He could just have walk away, but he needs us as much as we need him and I thank god he never told us to leave. He’s kind of a spectacular guy because he works from 6a.m. til 8p.m. all to support our family. He and my brothers (Tommy and Todd) farm over 2700 acres a year in Illinois, so it’s safe to say, I have a middle class life. I don’t ask for much because I know he works really hard and asking him for money is crazy. In return for his hard work, I cook dinner, clean the house, and help him in at night. I forgot to mention something, Tim’s paralyzed. He’s been that way for 30 years and still wakes up every day and goes to work like it never happened. He’s someone to marvel at, and most of all he’s someone to look up to at least I do. That’s why, I’m having a hard time on vacation. I don’t know what I should do.
I don’t leave Florida until August and the truth is I think I should be home helping not here having a good time while my step-dad is probably having a shitty time. I’d love your feedback so please leave a comment and in return I’ll read and comment your journal as well.